Things I Exclaimed At The Great British Bake Off - Week 3: Bread
- Val's "it's just another week" argument is all very well, unless you very nearly got kicked out last week - then you may need to raise your game.
- Not even five minutes in and Paul Hollywood's already in his element, mind-gaming everybody into thinking they doing the wrong thing... which, in fairness, they probably are.
- Selasi is almost without a doubt the only Baker I have ever seen literally lying down on the job.
- Note to self: "Silverback of Sourdough" would be an excellent name for a vegan punk band.
- "It's spent a little too long in the oven" is an excellent Berry-euphemism for "ruined".
- Summary of Paul's message to Candice: "actually cook your thing".
- "We've never done anything like this on bake off before." Ooh, are we having a barbecue?
- Genuinely delighted to learn that Dampfnudel is recognised by Google's speech recognition software!
- Last year, I complained a lot about how the technical bakes had become ridiculously complicated. Cake week and biscuit week had got us back on par, but I think it's fair to say dampfnudel have taken us back the other way again.
- Always encouraging when the technical challenge ends with Paul saying, "this one's the best, but still rubbish."
- 3D bread centerpieces seem like a lot to ask of bakers who had almost entirely raw dough in the previous day's challenges.
- "The problem with having a huge lump of dough for an elephant is you can't tell when it's cooked" - well, who hasn't had that problem?
- Andrew's new range of woven bread-based helmets are coming soon to Halfords.
- I've never seen anybody say "ta-da" in such a depressing tone before.
- Dear Lord, Val, don't start listing things that you need to work on - we don't have that long left in the programme.
- Irish Andrew, with the red hair, is wearing a green jumper. We then cut to Kate, who makes a reference to her Lucky Charm. Y'know what, Mr Editor, just calling him a leprechaun, and be done with it!