To the palest tent, where baking be done.
For where stress, and pressure, and havoc wreak
do cometh now, for Bake Off's Tudor week!
- Willing to bet Channel 4 have tuba money coming out of their ears...
- THIS JUST IN: Next year's Bake Off to be hosted by Paul Hollywood and a second-hand tuba.
- Andrew's decision to make thick pastry - based on his own personal preference - is no way to win at Bake Off. First thing Mary will say is "it's quite thick".
- Candice wants to use a cheaper meat, and oyster's are the famously the meat of the people...
- There are so few weeks on Bake Off where you get to include pigeon in the recipe.
- "In my eyes, a pie should have a little bit of leakage," says Candice. Even money that's not what Paul says.
- Andrew is such an engineer that he insists on measuring a diagram from Clip Art in order to get a clue as to how long his knots should be. Can't see anything going wrong there.
- If it were up to me this week's showstopper would have a Shakespeare theme; create a bake based on something in one of the plays. Who wouldn't want to eat the severed hands from Titus Andronicus baked in a pie?
- Mary: "You like a bit of alcohol in your bakes, don't you?"
Selasi: "Yeah, I don't mind a bit of alcohol."
Mary: "OMG! DID WE JUST BECOME BEST FRIENDS?"
- OK, Andrew's just showing off with homemade oven-proof horse molds, now.
- Six years of Bake Off, and Mel still can't tell the difference between marzipan and wood.
- NOTE TO SELF: Peacocks are nature's own showstopper.
- In fairness to Benjamina, when she applied, who knew they'd need a working knowledge of Tudor baking?